Ways to know you're getting too old

1. Your family all comes into town because your little nephew is graduating from high school.
2. You realize next year the family will come into town because your daughter is graduating from high school.
3. When someone says to you that they couldn't tell you intentionally shave your head, they just thought you were chrome dome bald.
4. You pass on drinking a soda at night because the caffeine will keep you up all night.
5. You have to hurt your teacher's feelings by telling her that no, in fact, unlike her, you're not in your mid-40's.
6. You know your last cholesterol reading by heart.
7. IRA becomes what you plan for, not what your great aunt's name is.
8. Grooming includes hair trimmers in your ears.
9. You'd rather have a cigar and a beer on the deck than go out to a nightclub.
10. You have more types of pain relievers in your medicine cabinet than you do condoms for the first time in your life.